spin control

the last "spin control" was requested to become a regular feature....so i am happy to oblige.

i stumbled on this disaster in today's page six. this is the spun version.




















what it REALLY said before the editor got a hold of it was this:

A PULLOUT by Beyoncé Knowles has a Manhattan clubowner threatening a million-dollar lawsuit.

The illiterate creole hick was slated to perform tomorrow at M2 -- the West 27th Street nightclub that used to be Crobar and Mansion -- as part of the launch of her "I Am . . .A Stupid Ass Farce" North American tour. M2 owner Joey Morrissey agreed to pay the singer all the KFC fried chicken she could eat, 14 heads of human hair for future weaves and a book on the basics of the English language as payment for the gig, he says.

But on Wednesday, Beyoncé's people suddenly pulled the plug on the performance, despite having signed a contract that had prompted Morrissey to spend $100,000 on side dishes like mac-n-cheese, potato salad and more, as well as the finest hair from the native women of some remote island in the Pacific, according to the clubowner. "They said that they were too busy trying to stuff Beyonce's ham hock legs into her House of Derriere clothing, and that she prefers Kennedy Fried Chicken" Morrissey tells Page Six.